rookshire | Take a look in the mirror

Take a look in the mirror

Who: Gladio & the people he needs to Talk to
What: The storm was rough but some conversations need to be had out of earshot of the others.
Where: Around the entrance areas
When: 5/21&22 directly after the storm.
Warnings: These are likely to be some pretty intense Talks but will warn in subject lines if anything gets into CW territory.

Immediately following the storm anyone that wants to talk to Gladio can find him in the locker room, the room he and the other chocobros share, fighting with thread made from unwound strips of muslin bandages and a suture needle from one of the first aid kits making another couple pairs of the same wrap shorts he'd been using for months on the islands. As little sewing as possible while still being light weight and effective. It's actually easier with the cut down sheets than it was with muslin, the tighter weave allowing him to sew closer to the edge than the loose muslin had.

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Cornering Ignis for a conversation was both easier and harder than he'd anticipated. Talking was fine. Getting him not just sort of alone (enough to make out) but actually alone was all but impossible. And he used the excuse of the last dregs of water in the pipes to drag Ignis into the bathroom with him, plunk him down with water and a brush from Scott and demand a tight 'French' braid. (Seriously, Cee, what kind of place is a French?) Once his boyfriend had gotten it started, settled into the pace of it, he took a deep breath and had to admit his treachery.

"I actually dragged you in here so we could talk without Noct or anyone overhearing. Cause... I love you but... I'm kinda pissed at you right now, babe."

Edited 2019-06-26 20:36 (UTC)

Quite honestly, Ignis begins to wonder if there is something going on the moment that Gladio insists that they do his braid in the bathroom. The water can be carried out so they can do the braid wherever they want, but that doesn't leave them alone and he's sure that is the point of all this. Ignis half-expects a discussion considering all that just happened, but nothing makes him consider that the discussion will be about Gladio being mad at him.

His hands pause for a moment on the braid as he struggles to figure out why, but eventually he has to give in and ask instead, "I'm afraid I'm not sure why you would be angry with me. Is this about me staying out of the fight with Liam?"

He can feel the uncertainty travelling down Ignis' fingers, still and thoughtful, holding his hair taut but not continuing for a moment and he immediately feels guilty. A sigh and he leans a little harder back against Ignis' legs.

"Nah, you're the only one of us with half a brain." A stiffled laugh and he lets one hand drop down from his lap to settle lightly against Ignis' ankle.

"I just... I thought we were doing better. With the whole talking things out, no more secrets." His fingers tighten, something hurt and pained in his voice for so many reasons.

"Why didn't you tell me he stabbed Lunafreya... In front of Noct, no less. I'm sitting there trying to convince him to give Ardyn a chance looking like a complete shitheel because he just watched her die and-" He cuts himself off abruptly, choking on his next breath, free hand coming up to scrub at his face before he does something stupid like start crying about this.

By the time Gladio stops speaking, the stillness that previously only affected Ignis' fingers has spread to his whole body. It doesn't even seem as if he is breathing. As if, in just a few seconds, he's been turned completely to stone. He only knows his heart is still beating because it hurts so much. First, to have Gladio think he was purposely keeping secrets again, and second, realizing that Noctis saw...

Breath finally shudders from his mouth, those shudders traveling down to his fingers as he searches for words. It was never meant to be a secret, but it had come out in a conversation where he and Ardyn talked of so many of his sins. Ignis had not been able to process all of them right then. He only knew that none of the truth changed what he felt--what he wanted--so it was pushed aside until he was able to process it.

Apparently, he waited too long.

He steps back from Gladio, unconsciously trying to hide how shaken is really is.

"Noctis was unconscious when Ravus and I made it to the Alter. I didn't know he had witnessed any of it."

It's not an excuse. Instead, Ignis is desperately grabbing at some starting point while he finally processes this particular sin of Ardyn's.

The thing is moving away from him is telling of how shaken he is and Gladio turns quickly, reaching for Ignis. He backs up but there isn't far to go in the bathroom and Gladio goes up on his knees, shuffling after his lover, arms sliding around his waist, resting his head against his belly.

"Okay... okay I'm sorry babe. It just seemed like sort of a big thing to not tell me and I was upset, finding out like that." He squeezes Ignis lightly, holds onto him, refuses to let him backpedal this time. "I'm not really mad anymore, not like I was when they first got here just... a little pissed."

Part of him screams that he needs to break free of the gentle hold even as another part of him screams just the opposite. Honestly, it's a little frightening to have such strong conflicting feelings when it comes to Gladio of all people, but for now it works to Gladio's advantage as the conflict keeps Ignis from attempting to free himself.

"Ardyn said she only had a few days left if even that." Ignis' voice is strangely detached as he speaks. Facts. Repeating the facts is safest. Meanwhile, he can try to wrangle his emotions back under control.

"Awakening and communing with the Astrals was killing her. O-One more thing none of us knew."

Unknown to him, tears have slowly started to track their way down his face. So much for getting his emotions under control...

As soon as he begins to speak again, voice gone distant like that Gladio shakes his head. The words are secondary to the way Ignis is crumbling in his hands. The Astrals were killing her, of course they were. Of course they would. Why the fuck not, why let Noctis have anything left-

But Ignis needs him so he can't let the rage come up to the surface the way he wants, instead he reaches out and, carefully as he can, he takes Ignis' weight. Pulls the advisor against his chest, gently tugs his feet out from under him, and lowers him into his lap so he can be held properly. There's not much to say that he hasn't already said, though now he feels like total crap for being mad in the first place. It was stupid and if he hadn't been so confrontational about it maybe Iggy wouldn't be falling apart like this.

"It's okay babe... I'm sorry. I've got you."

Oddly enough, Ignis doesn't resist the pull. He settles down into Gladio's lap almost as if he is a doll whose strings have been cut, head resting on the Shield's shoulder, turned so he can bury his face in his lover's neck. Tears fall faster now as, not only do his emotions about Lunafreya's death, but also his worries about everything begin to spill out. Honestly, he hasn't felt this out of control since he arrived on Enso over two years ago.

Lunafreya was fated to die just like Noctis was. Ardyn had just sped the process along slightly. Everything was planned from the very gifting of Ardyn with his powers so long ago to...to...

For a moment, his throat tightens and Ignis almost chokes on his own breath.

"Maybe...maybe Ardyn's right and this is a fool's quest. It was all fated. E-even my..." He laughs brokenly, curling tighter into Gladio, "I thought I was going to change fate and all I did was play the role Bahamut assigned to me from the very beginning."

Edited (Typos! Sorry about that!) 2019-07-09 23:21 (UTC)

He hasn't seen Ignis break down like this in a long time, even when he started to crack under the strain of the petals filling his lungs and entangling his joints he hadn't broken apart this much, perhaps close but it was regrets for the past, the weight of things that had already happened. That was what had made those delicate petals so powerful. When Ardyn was at his worst, when Gladio himself had fallen apart after finding out about Ignis and Ardyn, when Noctis left them time and again.

Iggy never broke.

For Luna to be the thing that finally tipped him over the edge was surprising but then Ignis had been there, adjacent to the tragedy of that day and Gladio hadn't been able to get close enough to help. He pulls th other man in against his chest, letting himself sway slightly, a subtle comforting rocking. His fingers go to sandy hair, threading through and reassuring himself for the thousandth time that there are no flashes of petals there.

"But Bahamut sure as hell didn't count on this place. Or on Tory, or on years of us together in different timelines to pull together what we know. So fuck him and fuck fate." Then he cradles Ignis' chin, tilts his head up to he has to face him, lets his forehead rest against his lover's. Gladio even reaches out to capture one of ignis' hands, leading it up to settle his fingers against his cheek, let him feel the tension and strength there in the set of his jaw and the furrow of his brow. "It may be a fool's quest but I swear to you, I will not stop. I will never stop trying and I will never give up. Not for you, not for Noct and not for Ardyn. On my honor. On my father's grave."

Even the strongest person's back can break under too many straws, and this was the last one for Ignis. It's not only Lunafreya's death and the emotions he never faced, but everything else that happened in Altissia. All of it is tied together and examining one aspect brings all of them up. He may love Ardyn dearly now, but nothing will ever erase the trauma of that day.

Ignis curls closer to Gladio and lets his tears fall while he focuses his mind completely on the gentle rocking motion and the feeling of the strong, steady arms around him. He's allowed to fall apart while Gladio is here to pick up the pieces, or at the very least hold those pieces together a while longer.

Even though the Shield is gentle when he pulls Ignis' head up, the advisor almost resists. He wants more time to hide where he knows nothing will harm him, but Gladio's words are so heartfelt that he can't ignore them.

He leans forward so he can press a tear-dampened kiss to Gladio's lips, "I know you won't and I love you for it." His fingers trail gently along the side of his lover's face, "You keep me pointed in the right direction even when I'm not sure what that is."

It kills him to see Ignis so upset but he's determined to do whatever he can to ease his suffering. He accepts that kiss but lets Ignis go back to hiding once he has acknowledged both his words and his conviction.

"Dunno it's always the right direction..." Sheepish and vaguely apologetic as he tucks Ignis in under his chin, dropping a kiss to his hair before settling his cheek heavily against the top of his head. Subtle grounding with the weight of his arms around the advisor again.

"We'll always find the right way forward, though. Long as we've got each other, babe." He might not trust either one of them one hundred percent but they balanced each other so well that he believed in them as a unit more than he'd ever trusted anything. Maybe even more than he'd trusted his Dad and Regis. It had been so long now it was hard to say.

"Yes." The word is soft, almost lost as Ignis hasn't resisted being tucked under Gladio's chin at all. He lets himself drift, not like he did sometimes back on the islands when he was desperately trying to run away from things that were too much, but just to let his mind rest while the last of his tears fall and then dry. He's tired suddenly, exhausted, but in a good way he can't help but think. This needed to happen.

Ignis lets himself loose track of time for a while, but about the time he feels himself in real danger of falling asleep in Gladio's embrace, he leans forward to press a kiss to the Shield's neck and then smiles up at him sleepily, "Thank you."

Ignis isn't the only one halfway to sleep. It's honestly a miracle no one's banged on the door to get them out of the fucking bathroom but they were both naturally early risers. Gladio hums softly in appreciation of that kiss, smiles down at Ignis and drops a matching one to his boyfriend's cheek.

"You wanna go back to bed?" Because he will carry you out of here in a full on bridal carry and put you back to bed if that's what you want babe.

"We shouldn't." The words are no more than a halfhearted attempt at denial, though. Instead of getting up, Ignis just snuggles further into Gladio, arms tightening around him.

That is about the clearest permission you are going to get, Gladio. Carry that man back to bed and cuddle with him until you both fall asleep!

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Take a look in the mirror

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